I am a slave. I am a slave to the banks. I am a slave to the
IRS. I am a slave to my job. Why? Because I am a debtor. Since 18 years of age I have turned accruing
debt into a lifestyle. Constant debting can become an
addiction. I should know. I love to buy things. I love to acquire. I love to spend. But I always saw myself as the controller. I didn't realize that I was the one being controlled. I was being controlled by this need to spend. I have become a slave to this society of consumption.
And who knows why I keep spending? In the beginning, before marriage, perhaps it was to appease my loneliness. I lived many miles away from my family and phone calls home did not always provide adequate comfort. I needed to be in a place that made me feel better. I also spend money because I am bored. In college, I remember spending much of my free time not studying or with friends but inside the mall or discount stores (yeah I'm talking about you TJMAXX and Marshalls), and even drugstores. Going into a CVS and purchasing the latest magazines, junk food, and other miscellaneous items always makes me feel better. Perhaps you can relate.
In retrospect, I wonder where I got the money in those days. Oh yeah, that's right, I charged it. I was introduced to
credit cards my first year in college. Corporations are smart, I'll give them that. They would set up shop right smack dab in the middle of the student union and would entice students over to their tables with candy, frisbees, t-shirts, whatever bright and shiny object to lure them in. I took the bait. I applied for my first credit card not thinking that a bank would actually give me one since I didn't even have a part-time job. Little did I know. A couple of weeks later I received my credit card in the mail and almost instantly I could pay for dinners and movies with friends and even get
cash advances. What more could a broke college student want? When the bills came in the mail I'd pay the minimum payment and continue down the path of destructive behavior in complete oblivion. I call it destructive because I was destroying my financial future.
Flash forward to Wednesday, October 13, 2010. I am several thousand dollars in debt. I have two degrees and the student loans to prove it. Including
interest, I owe over $100,000 in
student loan debt. I don't agree with the philosophy that student loan debt is "good debt." It is still debt that you must pay back.
Default on your student loans and you default on the rest of your life. I owe the IRS and state government almost $15,000 combined. I have over $7,000 in credit card debt when two months ago I had $0.00. You got that right. Two months ago I had
no credit card debt. Today I have thousands. Last year in 2009 I got myself out of over $12,000 worth of credit card debt and promised God I would never go back How long did that promise last? Yes, I broke a commitment to God. But who am I kidding? I was never that committed to begin with.
I was also married last year (God is
GOOD). My husband and I decided to purchase a house. An expensive house. A house that we really couldn't afford but were swayed by the relatively low
interest rate (4.8). And now our
property taxes have risen significantly which has added $300 more to our monthly payment. With bill fluctuations like that you'd think we have one of those dreadful adjustable-rate mortgages
(ARM). But no, our
mortgage is a 30 year fixed.
On Sunday, October 10, 2010 I decided to take my life back. I cannot spend the rest of my life owing money. I have to discover what is truly valuable in life. Things don't give your life value and meaning. I do not want to continue to make promises to God, my husband, my family, and myself that I cannot keep. It's time to make a change.
On October 10, 2010 I wrote out a 5 year plan. My husband and I combined make a decent income. But we live above our means purchasing more than we can afford. It's embarrassing really. I will be 35 soon. If you are 25 or 18 and reading this post please do what you can to not find yourself in the predicament that I am in now. Do what you can to be financially free. Don't be enslaved to society. My ancestors were in slavery for 400 years. Why have I jeopardized my own freedom by allowing myself to get enslaved to debt? Yet, that is what I have gone and done. But I digress...
A part of my 5 year plan (short term savings goals) will be documented on this blog. I want to see it every time I log in to post. Do yourself a favor. If you have goals, write them down. And if you don't have any, acquire some. There is no time better than the present to start making your dreams into a reality. Put it down on paper. Writing them down is the first step. Document it. Turn a thought into something actual. Life is short. We don't have all day.
I will not debt anymore. I am no good with credit cards. Some people can accrue a small amount of credit card debt and pay it all off on their next payment. I thought I could be that person. But I cannot. It is better for me not to have credit cards in my possession (although I keep the accounts open in order to keep my
FICO score up but that's also another post).
Thanks for reading thus far. I will document my journey here. Feel free to join me. I am open for discussion. I am here to finally help myself. And if I can help someone else in the process then that makes the purpose of this blog even greater.
